Little bits…

January 12, 2013

I am full of it these days…just filled up to the top…

My daughter gave me a fitness boot camp membership for Christmas. Was she sending me a message? She certainly was. Whether she realized it or not, she was telling me that it was time to put up or shut up. So, I decided to put up. The boot camp itself is fierce; conducted online, most of the women are considerably younger than I and are ALL considerably more fit than I. However, it is also very flexible and accommodating…it can even be dumbed-down for someone starting as slowly as I have. It is a circuit of targeted exercise routines, and so far, I am using hand weights, a stability ball, a mat and my front yard…I’m planning to add in some Wii games or dance sessions soon. Almost one week under my belt with mixed results. However, the best thing that has come from this is the knowledge that it doesn’t really matter WHAT I do, it is that I just do it. I have had great fun with the exercises and will try to incorporate sessions into my day-to-day life. I guess this post is my attempt to stay accountable to myself. So, thank you, Katy.

My internal clock is completely out of whack…I am still so sedentary that my brain doesn’t seem to require as much sleep as my body wants. Hmmm…maybe I should do more of the above and see if that tires my body out. Just a thought as I lie here in the wee hours of the morning.

I loved watching my son and daughter-in-law meet their brand-new nephew a few weeks ago…laughing at my son holding what he admitted was his first baby ever. And then, just a couple of weeks later, I had the joy of watching them meet their niece, my first grandbaby. Even more weepy-inducing were the looks on all their faces as they realized that they were all part of the next generation of our big, ol’ extended and extensive family…the baton has been passed. This mother’s heart was so full of happyhappyhappy…

And then there is Audrey…what more can I say about Audrey…before I had children, I was terrified that I would be a terrible mother. I got through that, and then was terrified that I would be a terrible grandmother. Well, once again, I had underestimated Mama Nature…there is some hormone or breath or lightning that strikes a human at the birth of one’s baby…and, much to my wonder, I discovered that it strikes again at the birth of one’s baby’s baby. It might help that we live far apart and I am not always there…it also helps (a lot) that my daughter is a prolific and imaginative photographer and sharer-with-her-mother, making said mother feel as if she is really there.

Most importantly, at least to me, I feel as if something that has long been frozen inside of me, something scary and dark, is starting to thaw a bit…I’m working on keeping that thaw going…

58259_10151600495335898_2118923149_n Audrey and Katy Audrey and Dad 8334215925_7de53076bc (1) 321052_10151588319460898_1352897684_n 307562_10151587716895898_1003829303_n


6 Responses to “Little bits…”

  1. First and always, I love you.

    It’s a delicate balance when you love someone and want them around forever. The last thing I wanted to do with bootcamp was back you into a corner with health and wellness. I know so well that you have to want to make a change to have it stick, and if you find that it’s just not something that makes you happy, it’s not worth it.

    So I hope that whatever lesson the bootcamp gives you, it makes you happy. 🙂 But I’m not above using Audrey and all of your future grandbabies as leverage to inspire you to do whatever you can to be with us for a long, long time.

    For me, the trick was making exercise and eating well a routine. It sucked at first, and it took me a while to really enjoy it. But healthy living is sneaky…not only did I realize how much better I felt when I enjoyed my clothes and the way I looked, but how gross I felt when I had a stretch of not exercising. Now I crave the sweaty endorphin release that working out gives me (and I really don’t think a gym is necessary — I happen to love it, but I also love dancing in my living room and taking long walks and riding my bike and walking on the beach).

    Selfishly, I wish you were closer 😦 So all of the sharing is as much for me as it is for you.

    • StarStruk Says:

      I was thrilled with my gift and I thank you so much for it.

      Maybe distance is good, though…makes for easy loving and less annoyance…you know what “they” say about “propinquity breeding contempt”?

  2. Suzy Says:

    My new word for the day “propinquity” !!!! Love your post a new Grandma too! Suz

  3. I think what I love most is that you mentioned just doing it. That’s all I ever expect from any participant, no matter what level. Do what you can and make it work for you. Give YOUR best and you can’t feel badly about that. You should feel PROUD of that. And Katy sure did give you a beautiful granddaughter. I’m rooting you on as well, so never hesitate to reach out for help. Either to me or that wonderful daughter of yours. 🙂

  4. karen Says:

    First, congratulations on taking the big step of trying to get into shape. I am doing the same thing and the only reason I can keep at it is the support of my family and friends. Same reasons…I want to be around for many years for my grandchildren. Keep at it….slow but sure wins the race!
    Second……was a freakin’ cute baby!!!!

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